White Girl Problems by Babe Walker

Author:Babe Walker
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
Tags: (¯`'•.¸//(*_*)\\¸.•'´¯)
Publisher: Hyperion
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

After the first Tony Method workout, I was so exhausted I could barely stand up, let alone lift my post-workout smoothie to my lips. Phase I was the hardest phase of The Tony Method. My body had to get used to doing lots of strenuous physical activity, and up until that point in my life, the most physical I’d ever been was my daily, seven-minute treadmill walks, thirty-minute sauna naps, and the four miles total that I ran when I lived in New York. I also had to overcome my fear of sweating in front of another human being, which was at first terrifying then liberating. That was the great thing about The Tony Method. It showed you how strong you really could be.

Tony and I continued our workouts, substituting lunge fucks and my personal favorite, the bridge position, on days when I needed to feel that extra burn. He was the best. And it wasn’t about the sex—yes, Tony had a great dick, GREAT dick, but he also pushed me to work really hard and wouldn’t let me give up when I was tired, which was always. One time he actually came into my room and pulled me out of bed to go work out after I’d tried to text him and cancel all our sessions for the week. I’m pretty sure in most cultures that would be considered rape, but I let it slide. That’s just the kind of guy Tony was—really attentive to my needs and fitness goals. For example:

FROM Babe Walker <[email protected]>

TO Anthony Chasen <[email protected]>

DATE Wed, May 4, 2010 at 11:39pm

SUBJECT Legs

My thighs are getting way too muscly. WTF.

FROM Anthony Chasen <[email protected]>

TO Babe Walker <[email protected]>

DATE Wed, May 4, 2010 at 11:45pm

SUBJECT Re: Legs

Babe,

Don’t worry. We’ll start incorporating more muscle lengthening exercises and cut down on squats in Phase II.

FROM Babe Walker <[email protected]>

TO Anthony Chasen <[email protected]>

DATE Wed, May 4, 2010 at 11:47pm

SUBJECT Re: re: Legs

Okay. I would totally not be worrying but I was measuring my thighs and calves earlier, and the ratios were off by approx 0.42 inches. Not okay. Like, please no more squats. I’m not a bodybuilder Tony. Also, I’m looking in the mirror, and I’m thinking that when I turn to the side, I want my torso width to be exactly 2x my arm width. Doable?

FROM Anthony Chasen <[email protected]>

TO Babe Walker <[email protected]>

DATE Wed, May 4, 2010 at 11:50pm

SUBJECT Re: re: re: Legs

Yes. We’re switching gears entirely in Phase II. Phase I was all about building up your muscles and getting your body used to rigorous aerobic activity. Phase II is all about lengthening your proportions with Pilates and ballet inspired movement. Trust in the method, Babe. You’ll see results.

FROM Babe Walker <[email protected]>

TO Anthony Chasen <[email protected]>

DATE Wed, May 4, 2010 at 11:51pm

SUBJECT Re: re: re: re: Legs

It’s hard for me to trust the method when I look in the mirror and see The Hulk staring back at me. It’s hard for me to trust you.

FROM Anthony Chasen <[email protected]>

TO Babe Walker <[email protected]>

DATE Wed, May 4, 2010 at 11:55pm

SUBJECT Re: re: re: re: re: Legs

Have faith, Babe.

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